Safe

I am part of a Facebook writer’s group. This week, our challenge was to write song lyrics. I chose to share the lyrics of a song I wrote a few years ago. Writing this song was very cathartic for me. As I typed out the words, I was able to process how was I was feeling, what was keeping me from trusting God, and realizing the deep down desire for a deeper relationship with Him.

I would like to share this with you now. If you have ever found yourself doubting God’s love for you, maybe these words might touch something in your spirit.

So, here is my song, “Safe”.

I know You're there
Even though I can't feel You
I used to feel You
Breathing on me
But now I have to turn away
Cover my eyes
Shield my heart
I won't let You get to me
I know You're real
But I can't take the chance
Of disappointing You
Again and again
To think that once
You were the center of my universe
Has my zeal for You come to an end?
I'm coming undone
I'm losing my faith
I'm searching for truth
But still going astray
Everything that I knew
Is no longer the same
I can't hide all the pain
And I am ashamed
I am no longer safe
Crying out in the dark
In the light, day or night
Nothing seems to soothe my aching soul
My heart is withering rapidly
My desire for You is waning
Leaving behind a jagged, empty hole
Why have You forgotten me?
Why have You just left me here
To fight the doubts
Completely on my own?
I read Your Word
But the text just blurs
As it mingles with my bitter tears
I have never before felt so alone
I'm coming undone
I'm losing my faith
I'm searching for truth
But still going astray
Everything that I knew
Is no longer the same
I can't hide all the pain
And I am ashamed
I am no longer safe
I'm looking for You
To come charging to my rescue
But Your presence is more like a whisper in the wind
I'm reaching out an uncertain hand
To keep myself from falling
But I'm feeling You inviting me back in
So intense, so afraid
So aware of what You've paid
No more fighting
No more hiding
Just breathe
Just breathe on me
The battle is won
I'm regaining my faith
I've accepted Your truth
I need You every day
So I drop to my knees
As I beg and I pray
That You'll work through my pain
The regret and the shame
'Cause with You
I am safe

Please
Just breathe on me

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